It's really interesting reading this from a portrait photographers perspective. I'm always paying attention to cues from the subject who oftentimes isn't used to being in front of a camera. Sometimes I'll notice something and know to change the cadence and offer some water, a snack, or just a break.
The irony is sometimes the subject doesn't feel confident in front of the camera even when they are internally very confident. With the camera I try to show them that truth even though sometimes the truth has to be drawn out from them. Thanks for a thought provoking article.
Kevin, it's fascinating to hear about this from a portrait photographer's perspective. Paying attention to cues and knowing when to offer a break or some comfort can make such a difference. Now it's true that even confident people can feel uneasy in front of a camera.
Am curious, how do you help your subjects feel more at ease during a shoot? Your approach and insights really highlight the importance of understanding and patience in your work. Thanks for sharing your experience, Kevin!
It's an interesting question, Sol, and I think in a way it changes for every photographer based on what their intent is. For me, I want to empower my clients or even people I approach on the street. From the very first interaction to when the photos happen, whether it's five minutes or five days I want to be approachable, open, and communicative. I tell my subjects, "There is nothing you can do wrong." And that can take the pressure off. I try to get them into a space where they are comfortable by just getting to know them and having fun with them. People open up with playfulness. Often, I let them pose naturally to what feels authentic to them as well. I feel that's more impactful for them when they see their photos.
Another interesting digression is sometimes I am capturing small moments of joy or confidence which might feel inauthentic to them when they see them initially. The hope for me is for them to see themselves as that embodied confident person even if they aren't used to seeing it. The lie lays a path for their truth to come out. It gives them permission to be that person and I think that can be powerful for a persons version of self. Who they think they are vs. who the world sees them as. So reflecting that version to them, along with some of that current version even, can help build a story that feels real. "Yes, I have these versions of me, this struggle and this light. They are both true but damn, look at how strong this light is!" We only need a few minutes a day of that feeling. That's enough to change our version of ourself slowly and authentically. I appreciate the thoughtful question, Sol!
I notice all these cues in most of the people I encounter whenever I’m out in public. It’s honestly a shame so many people have been conditioned to be so uncomfortable just being, it’s like they’re always anticipating some type of judgment or they’re anxious to be anywhere but *here*.
Justine, I know exactly what you mean. It's worrying to see how many people feel uneasy just being themselves in public. It's like they're always worried about being judged or can't fully relax and enjoy the present moment.
How do you manage to stay present and comfortable in these situations? Your awareness of this issue is important and can help others feel more at ease 💙
I haven’t always been this aware, I’ll be honest. Since rooting my Faith in Jesus who can do all things, the stress and anxiety of having to perform for people has been taken away. It’s like my faith cured me of people-pleasing, because I know in my heart only God can judge me. In this sense He really is my savior, saved me from the disease of seeking external validation, and I can simply trust that if I strive to be genuine, patient, and kind in any given situation, He will take care of the rest. My faith is truly the secret to how I have the strength of Peace. 🙏🏽
Eye contact is very difficult for me. I get overwhelmed by the confusing information I get, as I am unable to decipher body language and non-verbal cues. In addition, I can often be found fidgeting, as it helps me cope with the sheer amount of information that is flooding me, be it sensory or my own thoughts. I then react with a closed body language, which I try to open by mirroring the other once I am aware of it.
People have called me inauthentic, arrogant, aggressive, defensive, insecure, accused me of hiding things from them, even lying.
I call myself a person on the autism spectrum trying hard to connect the best I can. Sure, I am masking. But my motivation is different.
My favorite cue is when someone says something funny and immediately looks at the person they like the most. Even if you're not the one making the joke, when everyone is laughing in a group, people will look at the person they like the best. Typically, best friends tend to look at each other, and others will look at their crush. However, if their crush or best friend isn't there, they will still look at someone with whom they feel the strongest connection.
Additionally, our eyes are very expressive, especially regarding where we look. When we look directly upwards, it tends to indicate recalling something or a memory. Looking to the top right usually suggests someone might be lying.
Sara, excellent breakdown and observation of social interactions. Now it's true that our eyes can reveal a lot about our feelings and connections. And yes, eye movement can often hint at what someone is thinking or feeling.
Have you noticed any other cues that reveal how people relate to one another? Your insights on this topic are really insightful, Sara!
Regarding body language, body orientation is also indicative. Essentially, if your body is directly facing someone or not. Touch is another obvious cue, though it is highly culture-dependent. Double kisses on cheeks is the norm in Greece for both genders and regardless of age, in other countries this might be perceived as closeness, but to us this is how we tend to greet people. Same applies for hugging or hand shakes. Eyebrows are as expressive as eyes; for example, I know that when I hear something I think is bs, I tend to raise my right eyebrow without realising it. I try to be more aware of this, especially during work meetings with cameras on! 🙈😅
For verbal cues, the choice of words is very indicative, as is pitch. Mirroring the other person’s phrasing and wording can be a significant indicator. One that I love, is when people mention the other person's name, especially in one-to-one conversations. With of course this being a positive one.
The list goes on and on! There's so many things, and I truly enjoy them as they're basically patterns. The more people you're exposed to, and various different cultures the better you understand people's intentions.
I find talking to someone who refuses to make eye contact - or does so fleetingly- to be one of the most annoying things! I never know how to translate it.
Thank you for addressing this topic! Nowadays, there are so many inauthentic & toxic people inhabiting the world. Everyone reading... Please be careful! ❤️🩹
It's really interesting reading this from a portrait photographers perspective. I'm always paying attention to cues from the subject who oftentimes isn't used to being in front of a camera. Sometimes I'll notice something and know to change the cadence and offer some water, a snack, or just a break.
The irony is sometimes the subject doesn't feel confident in front of the camera even when they are internally very confident. With the camera I try to show them that truth even though sometimes the truth has to be drawn out from them. Thanks for a thought provoking article.
Kevin, it's fascinating to hear about this from a portrait photographer's perspective. Paying attention to cues and knowing when to offer a break or some comfort can make such a difference. Now it's true that even confident people can feel uneasy in front of a camera.
Am curious, how do you help your subjects feel more at ease during a shoot? Your approach and insights really highlight the importance of understanding and patience in your work. Thanks for sharing your experience, Kevin!
It's an interesting question, Sol, and I think in a way it changes for every photographer based on what their intent is. For me, I want to empower my clients or even people I approach on the street. From the very first interaction to when the photos happen, whether it's five minutes or five days I want to be approachable, open, and communicative. I tell my subjects, "There is nothing you can do wrong." And that can take the pressure off. I try to get them into a space where they are comfortable by just getting to know them and having fun with them. People open up with playfulness. Often, I let them pose naturally to what feels authentic to them as well. I feel that's more impactful for them when they see their photos.
Another interesting digression is sometimes I am capturing small moments of joy or confidence which might feel inauthentic to them when they see them initially. The hope for me is for them to see themselves as that embodied confident person even if they aren't used to seeing it. The lie lays a path for their truth to come out. It gives them permission to be that person and I think that can be powerful for a persons version of self. Who they think they are vs. who the world sees them as. So reflecting that version to them, along with some of that current version even, can help build a story that feels real. "Yes, I have these versions of me, this struggle and this light. They are both true but damn, look at how strong this light is!" We only need a few minutes a day of that feeling. That's enough to change our version of ourself slowly and authentically. I appreciate the thoughtful question, Sol!
Glad to help, Kevin. Absolute delightful discussion, thank you too!
I notice all these cues in most of the people I encounter whenever I’m out in public. It’s honestly a shame so many people have been conditioned to be so uncomfortable just being, it’s like they’re always anticipating some type of judgment or they’re anxious to be anywhere but *here*.
Justine, I know exactly what you mean. It's worrying to see how many people feel uneasy just being themselves in public. It's like they're always worried about being judged or can't fully relax and enjoy the present moment.
How do you manage to stay present and comfortable in these situations? Your awareness of this issue is important and can help others feel more at ease 💙
I haven’t always been this aware, I’ll be honest. Since rooting my Faith in Jesus who can do all things, the stress and anxiety of having to perform for people has been taken away. It’s like my faith cured me of people-pleasing, because I know in my heart only God can judge me. In this sense He really is my savior, saved me from the disease of seeking external validation, and I can simply trust that if I strive to be genuine, patient, and kind in any given situation, He will take care of the rest. My faith is truly the secret to how I have the strength of Peace. 🙏🏽
Amen Justine. 🙏🏻
Mirroring is one of my fav psychological forces.
Not easy to replicate without sounding like a parrot, but it works magic.
Eye contact is very difficult for me. I get overwhelmed by the confusing information I get, as I am unable to decipher body language and non-verbal cues. In addition, I can often be found fidgeting, as it helps me cope with the sheer amount of information that is flooding me, be it sensory or my own thoughts. I then react with a closed body language, which I try to open by mirroring the other once I am aware of it.
People have called me inauthentic, arrogant, aggressive, defensive, insecure, accused me of hiding things from them, even lying.
I call myself a person on the autism spectrum trying hard to connect the best I can. Sure, I am masking. But my motivation is different.
My favorite cue is when someone says something funny and immediately looks at the person they like the most. Even if you're not the one making the joke, when everyone is laughing in a group, people will look at the person they like the best. Typically, best friends tend to look at each other, and others will look at their crush. However, if their crush or best friend isn't there, they will still look at someone with whom they feel the strongest connection.
Additionally, our eyes are very expressive, especially regarding where we look. When we look directly upwards, it tends to indicate recalling something or a memory. Looking to the top right usually suggests someone might be lying.
Sara, excellent breakdown and observation of social interactions. Now it's true that our eyes can reveal a lot about our feelings and connections. And yes, eye movement can often hint at what someone is thinking or feeling.
Have you noticed any other cues that reveal how people relate to one another? Your insights on this topic are really insightful, Sara!
Regarding body language, body orientation is also indicative. Essentially, if your body is directly facing someone or not. Touch is another obvious cue, though it is highly culture-dependent. Double kisses on cheeks is the norm in Greece for both genders and regardless of age, in other countries this might be perceived as closeness, but to us this is how we tend to greet people. Same applies for hugging or hand shakes. Eyebrows are as expressive as eyes; for example, I know that when I hear something I think is bs, I tend to raise my right eyebrow without realising it. I try to be more aware of this, especially during work meetings with cameras on! 🙈😅
For verbal cues, the choice of words is very indicative, as is pitch. Mirroring the other person’s phrasing and wording can be a significant indicator. One that I love, is when people mention the other person's name, especially in one-to-one conversations. With of course this being a positive one.
The list goes on and on! There's so many things, and I truly enjoy them as they're basically patterns. The more people you're exposed to, and various different cultures the better you understand people's intentions.
I find talking to someone who refuses to make eye contact - or does so fleetingly- to be one of the most annoying things! I never know how to translate it.
Haha yeah, it's gets really annoying and some people just don't change.
Brilliant post ! Thank you for sharing
Smita! Thank you for reading :)
Thank you for addressing this topic! Nowadays, there are so many inauthentic & toxic people inhabiting the world. Everyone reading... Please be careful! ❤️🩹
It's a scary world out there, Leslie. Thank you for your kind words, appreciate you for reading 🧡